Early in life it makes sense to move on more easily, not because we value people or partners less, but because we’re still figuring out ourselves and how the world works. There’s just more uncertainty.
Later, when we know more about who we are and what fits, it’s natural to switch less.
Good article. What I've found disappointing as I age is the extent that people I know treat friendship as a zero sum game. I feel like I'm always being looked at in the context of the value I provide, rather than basic camaraderie between two people. This is basically the norm.
I read a book on the Anthropology of friendship in the past year, and it said that some people have the ability to be 'true' friends. That is they extend goodwill regardless of circumstances or who you are. Most people don't have the ability to do this, which is why I think everyone always feels disappointed by their relationships.
This made me think of the secretary problem.
Early in life it makes sense to move on more easily, not because we value people or partners less, but because we’re still figuring out ourselves and how the world works. There’s just more uncertainty.
Later, when we know more about who we are and what fits, it’s natural to switch less.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Secretary_problem
to the point, that it is reasonable to commit altogether to the choice.
Good article. What I've found disappointing as I age is the extent that people I know treat friendship as a zero sum game. I feel like I'm always being looked at in the context of the value I provide, rather than basic camaraderie between two people. This is basically the norm.
I read a book on the Anthropology of friendship in the past year, and it said that some people have the ability to be 'true' friends. That is they extend goodwill regardless of circumstances or who you are. Most people don't have the ability to do this, which is why I think everyone always feels disappointed by their relationships.